Lip Gloss

Well...I'm coming up on my 9th anniversary this month. It's flown by. Many things have changed, but there is one constant in our marriage. Lip Gloss.

Who would have thought that Lip Gloss would be the "X-factor" of us? Stephen is color blind. I knew that when I married him. I also realized early on that he couldn't tell if I was wearing makeup or not. In fact, one day before kids, I went upstairs to get ready to go out on a "date." I came downstairs wearing a dress and with makeup on half my face. Yep. Right down the middle. I went all out too. I had eyeshadow, mascara, lip and eye liner, blush, foundation, powder...anything that Cover Girl made, I had it on. I admit, I looked awful...just plain goofy. Well, Stephen took one look at me and told me I looked beautiful. I excused myself (said I forgot something upstairs) ran upstairs to wash my face and went back down.

It was easy for me. I didn't need to worry about makeup. After all, if my husband can't tell the difference, then why should I wear it? I mean, he's the one that I need to impress, right? So, for the last 9 years, makeup has been very easy for me. There is one thing...sometimes, I like a little lip gloss, chapstick...anything that makes the sandpaper on my lips go away.

It just so happens that immediately after applying the lip gloss, warning bells go off in the house. Stephen will come to give me a kiss goodbye and recoil from the sight of lip gloss. It's as if there is a physical barrier between the two of us...a shiny barrier. Now that I think about it, I should be thankful that he even kissed me at the altar on our wedding day. I was most definitely wearing lip gloss that morning.

So the other night, I probably didn't help my "cause" very much. I had put on a "plumping gloss" - one that makes your lips tingle a little bit. (I know this post really isn't for the boys here...) Stephen and I were out without kids and when he wasn't expecting it, I gave him a kiss. Just a little peck on the lips. No biggie. However, I forgot that it was the tingling kind of gloss. It took him a while to figure out why his lips were (in his words) burning. He thought it was the food. He thought it was the drink. He tried to think of anything that would cause that "horrible feeling" on his lips. And then he remembered. He remembered that little peck and he asks, "Are my lips burning because of the stuff on your lips?"

Hmmmm...how does a girl answer this? A nice wife would have apologized and swore not to do it again. Not me! Nope! I got the giggles and soon started to snort and tried to kiss him again. You see...not helping my cause.

I guess color blind husbands aren't gloss blind. I guess I should be thankful that I don't have to do my makeup every morning to make Stephen love me. I should be thankful that the clothes that he wears or that I wear don't have to be fancy labels. But...I know that Stephen will see if his clothes are glossy...that's for sure.

I'll keep on trying to sneak in those glossy kisses for now. It's something that makes him roll his eyes at me. And hey, if I can't make my husband roll his eyes over something as silly as lip gloss...then I have no business wearing it.